The importance of a name
Keeping a child’s first name in adoption helps protect their identity and sense of belonging.
Adoption comes with a profound responsibility to honour a child’s identity and personal history. One of the most significant ways to do this is by keeping a child’s first name when adopting them.
While giving a child a new first name may seem like a small decision, it holds deep implications for the child’s sense of self and connection to their past.
Why maintaining a child’s given name is so important in the adoption process
Preserves identity and history
A child’s name is often one of the first and most personal aspects of their identity; it can sometimes be the only gift a birth parent is able to give their child. It connects them to their heritage, culture, and their birth family.
Changing their name can feel like erasing a part of their story.
By keeping their first name, adoptive parents acknowledge and honour the child’s past, showing that their life before the adoption is valued and respected.
Promotes a sense of continuity
Adoption is a major life transition, and for children, it can be overwhelming. Amidst changes in environment, caregivers, and routines, a child’s name can serve as a comforting constant.
It acts as a bridge between their past and future, giving them a sense of continuity and stability in an otherwise transformative time.
Builds trust and respect
For children, especially older ones, the decision to keep their name can help establish trust with their adoptive parents. It communicates a message of respect: that their individuality and experiences are acknowledged.
This meaningful act can help foster a deeper bond between the child and their new family.
Honours cultural or familial ties
Many names carry cultural, religious, or familial significance. Renaming a child without understanding the importance of their original name can unintentionally sever those ties.
Keeping their name not only respects their background but also provides an opportunity for adoptive parents to celebrate and integrate the child’s culture into their new family’s traditions.
Avoids a sense of loss
Adopted children often experience a sense of loss as they transition into their new lives. This can include losing familiar surroundings, routines, and relationships. Changing their name might amplify this feeling, as it can be perceived as losing yet another part of their identity. By retaining their given name, adoptive parents can help mitigate this sense of loss and provide a sense of belonging.
The impact on family time
Changing a child’s first name also has implications for family time with birth family members, both direct and indirect, which needs careful consideration.
Explaining to a child and a birthparent (who has not agreed to a change of name) or a birth sibling, that a new name has been given may be very difficult and distressing.
Alternatively avoiding this and asking an adopted child to revert to their original birth name for family time will be confusing and give a very negative message about the child’s identity.
When is a first name changed? What about middle names and surnames?
A child’s forename or surname should only be changed in very exceptional circumstances. An example could be where there is concern that a birth family member, who poses significant risk of harm, may try to trace a child and a child has been given a very unusual name which could easily identify them.
When the Adoption Order is made the child legally takes the adopters’ surname. Many adopters give the child a middle name of their own choosing. A complete change of forenames is not usual and apart from very exceptional circumstances is not likely to be supported by the Local Authority or the Court.
It is not enough for adopters to keep the child’s first name as a middle name by substituting a new first name. The name the child is actually called by and known as is the important name. Even a six month old baby can recognise its name and respond to this.
Final thoughts
Adoption is a journey of love, acceptance, and inclusion. By keeping a child’s first name, adoptive parents send a powerful message: that the child’s past matters, their identity is important, and they are cherished for who they are.
It’s a small but significant gesture that lays the foundation for trust, respect, and belonging.
When considering adoption, remember that a name isn’t just a label; it’s a part of the child’s story, and in choosing to preserve it, you’re helping to write a beautiful new chapter while honouring the pages that came before.
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